(As told to yours truly)
Those who think I am a lesbian, well, I must confess that I am a bi. However, it was in college that I got attracted to my teacher with whom I have shared some wonderful years together.
About myself, I have a bit tom-boyish looks and that’s how she, 28, (say Rita) got attracted to me. I was her student,19, and we used to board the metro from the same station in CP for DU. Although I lived in New Delhi area, she used to come from East Delhi. Her husband was into research and later she confessed to me that he was a gay too and had a south Indian partner.
I was a third year student then and Rita used to teach me. Since we traveled together there was an attraction. I thought it simply to be a simple teacher-student relationship confiding everything into her. Even my feelings about my friends delving into relationships and flings that I used to have in college. Suddenly, I realized she was getting too much involved with my life and surprisingly I too started delving into her affairs.
In emotional moments she used to hold my hand and be very touchy at times, I thought it was normal. I was in college and am pretty adventurous. I too started responding to her overtures. I loved her neckline so I was too physically getting attracted to her. I was open for experiments. All those metro rides to and from DU and long walks to college in campus or on cycle rickshaws, started taking its toll. I was in a relationship with her.
Why I chose her?
I had my childhood friends. They all were going around and had a bustling sex life. But in due course of time, all were getting bored of their relationship. I could see them, both boys and girls weren’t happy. They had their own trials and tribulations. So when it came to me, I thought the best-suited option for me was staying without a guy in my life. I had few quick-fire relationships which were enough to fulfill my bodily needs.
As for her, her husband had a regular sex partner. She had a tumultuous life. Since she had few friends as she shifted to Delhi after marriage, she had few friends to bank on. I provided her that badly-needed shoulder when she needed me. Few say that lesbian love or male-bonding only happens if they are too frustrated or have been-there-and-done-that a bit too much that you get bored out of sex. Hence the need as well as the urge to try alternate sex happens. Maybe this was the reason apart from my experimental nature.
During this time I met a guy. He was simply my sex partner and nothing else. I confided in him about my relationship with Rita and being liberal, he encouraged me. And it was on the Valentine’s Day, that we went on a date to CP’s Barista. We spoke to each other at length, caressed and spoke about her marriage, my future plans, etc. Evening we went back home. Nothing happened!
A week later, she called me home. Her husband had gone to his village on a ‘study tour’ along with his gay partner. Rita was home alone and she invited me home. She loved my boyish attitude and I was curious about experimenting. I was game for it just for the hec of it. Initially I enjoyed a lot. We were like two unsuspecting lovebirds enjoying our love life free from the cudgels of society. Had I got a boyfriend, it would have been hellish for me but with a woman along with me, I was like a free bird. However, I didn’t notice her growing possessiveness about me.
I passed out from college and shifted to south Campus. I was staying in a hostel so I was free from family bondage of going back home early, etc. I started staying with her and made a boyfriend in class. I enjoyed best of both worlds. We used to sleep and explore each other in bed in front of her husband. He had no problems.
However, Rita’s love for me was becoming obsession. She wanted me home by 7 pm and was repulsive towards my classmates. She felt stupid that I was going out with my classmates, it didn’t matter to her whether they were guys or girls. Moreover she was insecure about me, especially when she came to know I made a boyfriend. That day she created a huge scene at home.
When in hostel, she started keeping check on my boyfriend too. I didn’t like this attitude. We started having constant fights. To tease her I asked my boyfriend to sometimes give me love bytes on intimate parts so as to make her jealous. I also used to make stories that I slept with other girls and she used to crack up. This was my way of teasing her. I renewed my relationship with my sex partner. That day I spoke all about my relationship with him. I used to hide certain facts with him. But high on drinks, I told him all, each and every intimate details of our one-and-a-half-year-old relationship. That day too she created a huge scene. She hated me talking about him but enjoyed every detail about my lovemaking with him. She became violent in bed. I somehow didn't like it.
As time passed by, sex became boring and no more was I infatuated towards this chubby, clean-skinned sexy partner of mine. I started keeping a distance from her. Two months back we separated. Sometimes, she calls me but I don’t feel like responding to her overtures. She talks and she’s still insecure about me. I can’t help it. Life has to go on and I have to move ahead. Be it a guy or a girl, what’s in store for future is mystery. And I like solving mysteries.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
A Lesbian Affair
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